Social Support Networks

Discussion in 'Mindless Banter' started by Erik, Mar 15, 2007.

  1. Ana

    Ana Think back...Move forward

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    Not weird at all, awesome :thumb:
     
  2. Lynny

    Lynny I like me.

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    I forgot to mention, that although very few people in my life understand my lifestyle.....this forum is HUGGGGGE support. I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing without the encouragement and inspiration from you all. :hug:

    Thanks!
     
  3. Gary

    Gary Well-Known Member

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    Great thread.
     
  4. Robben

    Robben Well-Known Member

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    Carol, I find this sad... I'm sorry... :buddies: :kiss:
     
  5. Robben

    Robben Well-Known Member

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    Very much so... I know, I find myself drawing of this energy we create here... It's very much a positive ripple...
     
  6. Robben

    Robben Well-Known Member

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    Forgot what I was going to say... Give me a moment and it'll come back to me...:lol3:
     
  7. Robben

    Robben Well-Known Member

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    Fuck that - that it's his money... Sorry, but I just don't understand why my gender group has to play games like this in order to make themselves feel better... He's a needy kinda guy isn't he?
     
    • Like Like x 1
  8. radgirl

    radgirl Give me da candy!!!

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    I have very little support at home. My family has never understood. My bf doesn't get it either - and he really should. I've been thinking about this quite a bit as well. Part of me is a little jealous when I see people at the gym working out together. They are there supporting each other and I don't have that. I think if I got more support/reinforcement it would make things a lot easier. Good example of this is with my bf. We always make a plan to workout together and somehow, MAGICALLY, something goes wrong and he can't go, doesn't want to go, we have to leave the gym, etc.... I'm to the point now that if he's coming home early and I'm on my way to the gym, I won't answer the phone or mention the gym to him. I head straight there because I know he'll sabotage it somehow.

    I will say that my family and bf have adapted quite well to my issues with food. Since I have many sensitivities and what not with food and I can only eat a handful of things, they are quite supportive and understanding in that regard. However, if I were to say I wanted to do a competition or who knows what else, I would get looked at like I'm from some strange land. It's like someone is always trying to talk me out of something, that in turn makes me start to doubt myself - a lot. I know I can always support myself, but without the support of those around you, it's just that much harder because you find yourself with no one who understands or cares.
     
    Last edited: Mar 15, 2007
  9. MichelleS

    MichelleS Well-Known Member

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    yes it would.
     
  10. radgirl

    radgirl Give me da candy!!!

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    It honestly would. Yes, I have the people on the boards and it does help, but there come a time when you really want the people in your daily, face-to-face life to tell you that they support you. I get the schpeal (sp?) of "I will support whatever you chose to do" but I know that isn't true or sincere. I will get support if its something they want me to do or they approve of. I have been fighting the lack of support most of my life and I'm now fighting it with my bf. Then they wonder why I am so distant and keep to myself and don't say much. It's because there are things I think about and may want to do or try, but I don't say crap for fear that my thoughts will get knocked down or laughed at. If I had that "support and understanding" in real life, things just might be different.
     
  11. MichelleS

    MichelleS Well-Known Member

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    Thats just how I feel.

    Good Post

    During my prep I asked my parents to come and watch my show and they told me NO we will never come and see you wearing "that" on stage. What great support
     
  12. Ana

    Ana Think back...Move forward

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    Some ppl support others silently for many reasons. Just making sure you can get to the gym is support. You can't force someone to do what you are doing just because you need support. I workout alone. George doesn't enjoy lifting why would I force him? Sure I'd love to have him come along and spot me and get my bench up, etc, but he doesn't like that. George doesn't eat clean although he does eat fairly healthy, so why would I force him to live my lifestyle? how am I being supportive of him?
     
  13. mich56

    mich56 Well-Known Member

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    This would be hard Michelle, I can understand. However, this is when you choose not to listen to that. And know that you are a bigger and better person not to let that garbage into your life. You are an adult.

    All that stuff in your head about self doubt is the rackets that you have created. Just because they say that doesn't mean that they don't support you. You made, in your head, that they don't.
     
  14. Ana

    Ana Think back...Move forward

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    Michelle stop focusing so much on the negative and hang on to the positive's didn't you have ppl from this board at your show? Wasn't your husband there? Weren't your kids? I can't remember but I thought they were. I don't think my mom would come to any of my shows, but then again I don't watch her curl. I destest that sport :lol:
     
  15. radgirl

    radgirl Give me da candy!!!

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    Thank you. Honestly, I don't think I would even tell my mom or grandma. I am, by no means, trying to lay the blame on anyone and maybe I have a lot of pent up emotions that are coming out. The fact of the matter is that if I didn't have a place like this, I would probably blow up because no one in my life (the very few people I do have) don't understand. They never have understood. I have tried to explain it, but it goes in one ear and out the other. I don't care what it is that I want to do or try, no one gets it. And when they don't get it, it's just easier to try and talk me out of it and instill fear and self-doubt. I know I should just stand my ground and do "my thing" but when you are trying to accomplish something by yourself and you desperately need the support of those around you and you don't get it, it's almost a self-defeating.
     
  16. radgirl

    radgirl Give me da candy!!!

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    That's like saying everyone else came to my wedding but my parents. Yes, you have the support of others, but not the support of those that you really want.
     
  17. radgirl

    radgirl Give me da candy!!!

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    It's a different story when you someone tells you I am going to do XYZ with you and then they bail on you, time and time again.
     
  18. mich56

    mich56 Well-Known Member

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    Be thankful for other things that your mom and grandma do in your life. And then you will start to see that they do support you in all your endeavors, even the workouts and eating. You will discover that it works, the gratefullness for other things. It will bring out the what it is that you want from them. Because it is only in your brain that comes up with "how they feel"
     
    • Like Like x 1
  19. MichelleS

    MichelleS Well-Known Member

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    yes I had people come and support me from the board and Chris and the girls were there (til midnight what troopers) I just respect my mom so much and she has always been there for me and I wanted her therr for that support. But then I was half naked on stage
     
  20. Ana

    Ana Think back...Move forward

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    Yes I get this often from my husband. I'm not going to drink so much beer, I'm going to watch what I eat, I'm going to bring you to my gym so you can show me some stuff. Never does it, he gets annoyed that i smile when he says it. I know he doesn't want to do it. I always tell him when you're ready you'll just do it instead of talking about it all the time. I think my point is if you want to do it do it. Don't worry about anyone else but yourself, if ppl start to follow in your foot steps great, bonus. That's how I feel. I come here for support.
     

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